There is only a few things that speak louder than words. Even though we are always saying actions speak louder than words, your choice of clothes does too. What you wear matters! We read so much into what type of person someone is by their shoes or type of jeans they have. If our outward appearance is so powerful we should us it wisely. Here’s why.
You ever make a friend and one day you’re hanging out, just talking and chilling. Then you guys go from laughing and making jokes to discussing something super personal. Then afterwards during an awkward silence you say “Did we just have a moment?”. And from that moment on you two become inseparable. And now you can’t even remember what life was like without them.
Once a friend of mine told me she wanted to know how to do makeup so that she can get dressed up for special occasions. A guy who was with us proceeded to shut that idea down by saying she did not need make up to feel beautiful and special. Granted that may be true but here I am, full face is beat, and I feel somewhat ostricised. As if because I am wearing makeup, I have not accepted myself as beautiful. Sidenote: can we just reject the narrative that women who wear makeup have low self esteem and haven’t embraced themselves. it’s tired and not true. And if you truly cared about her self-esteem you should probably focus on making her feel seen regardless of what she looks like.
This “you must have multiple streams of income, entrepreneurship, I just bought 5 more books to read, have you binged the latest season on Netflix” society can be absolutely draaaaining. We are expected to do so much, then we consume so much, then have to then process soooo much.
I don’t know about y’all but when goal setting for the year or my life, I start making a list of all the things I need to be successful. A million dollars, a really nice camera, fancy clothes for photoshoots, thousands of followers. But honestly, you really don’t need much. When I started blogging I honestly had just a closet full of t-shirts and plans to take over the world.
Still coming down from homecoming high, where we stood shoulder to shoulder with other black people gathered together for the chance to just be in the midst of us and our culture. There is something special about these spaces called HBCUs. They provide a space for us to grow and learn without the fear of being too anything. Or as my friend says, “gives me the freedom to be the black that I am”. If you’ve ever worked at a predominantly white organization, you know how hard it can to just change your hair in peace, or use certain terminology without thinking someone will judging you. These campuses cultivate so much culture and provide skills and knowledge that prepare us for the working world.